Return to my Complaint Department
Go to my home page
© Copyright 2001, Jim Loy
Note: I have changed the various names to Jane Doe and John Doe in this article, as I try not to use real people's names without permission.
In the last three months, Jane Doe and her clones have emailed me 166 times, about the game of checkers. These emails are sometimes difficult to read, and many misunderstandings (it seems) passed back and forth. Here is the first message:
Hello sir!
Could u tell me the differences between all those checkers versions?
Let's say English checkers was played with a new rule of pieces allowed the long jump only, would that make the game easier or not? What is a long jump exactly, could u demonstrate me and show an example?
would move pieces backwars and capture ( most ) make the game stronger or less stronger?how?
regards
Although I didn't understand some of these questions, I attempted to answer one of her questions:
I assume you mean the longest multiple jump. It would cut down the options slightly. Rarely, it would fool people who are used to the old rules, as sometimes you gotta take the shorter jump to win or draw.
After about five or six emails, it became apparent that I never did know what she was asking. What checkers versions? What did she mean by "long jump?" She is asking me what a long jump is, and I haven't a clue. It is apparently not what I assumed in my first answer, "the longest multiple jump." I tried in vain to get her to clarify what she was asking. She asked again, "what about capturing it backwards?" Since I didn't know what she was talking about, I couldn't answer that one. She asked me this question over a dozen times, without ever clarifying what she meant.
She sent me several messages a day, each asking one question: "how come some variation in checkers have pieces on different colors, I mean it starts from the righ corner where the first piece is located?" As I was inundated with unanswerable questions, I answered the few that I understood. When I got this one, I started consigning her email to the trash: "u sick in your head?" Here is another one:
i really need the answer how would be if there was capture backwars and especially in checkers allowed the option of capturing all the checkers with the right capture ( why right?) would that make it stronger or what?
I don't understand. Then she became "The Caring Person" and sent this, entitled " THIS QUESTIONS!":
for other versions, and in which ones? CAn u modify th eprogram to [play the long jump? does that complicate matters in checkers, or capture andy piece and most peices which ones is easier? all other versions exist since what centruy, year?
She also became Jane Doe #2 and Jane Doe #3:
how many openings are there in 10x10? in 8x8 there are 144 and 30 nog good ones?
Then I got this from John Doe:
sir, I need an email to the checkers champ King or to his agent, I have a business proposition for a match, very important!
It became apparent that this was also Jane Doe: "how to avoid the repetiion of moves in GAYP, is there some strategy likein ches?" Then she became Jane Doe #4. Then she became John Doe #2:
how come in checkers it takes over 40 moves or 100 to win a game even if it;s 4 to 4 or 3 t0 3 pieces left, so usually if there r equal number of pices left, then that's a draw, but like in chess when there is a rook and a panw vs rook, u can almost always get a draw, tell me is it the same in checkers? what to do to achieve that?
Then she became John Doe #3: "so u mean in checkers it;s upside down the board and black moves first?why? since when this checkers rules r in existence, what year exactly?" Lately, she asked me this:
anyway, answer me: are this wins or what?
K=KING, M=MEN
4K VS 3K
3K+1M VS 3K
2K+2M VS 3K
1K+3M V 3K OR 2 K
4M V 3K 2K 1K
My response was that, in general, all are wins for the player with more pieces. She then asked me this same question, over and over. And I repeated my answer. The latest question: "ok, what about 4M VS 1K, LOOK THE LAST TWO BELOW, why is it so hard just to say yer or no" And I blew my top and told her to stop bothering me. I doubt if that is going to work.
Of course, the story goes on. Jane/John Doe is upset with this article, and is threatening to continue to send me email. At least that will make an interesting, continuing story. I have received eleven emails, so far today, from her.
At least one of these people seems to be a real person, and has made a few threats to shut down my WWW pages, and has sent me about a dozen emails today. As I said in the first paragraph, I have changed the various names to Jane Doe and John Doe in this article, as I try not to use real people's names without permission.
None of the email that I have received has been very abusive. But there has been a lot of it. Some of the questions, I thought I answered pretty well. Other questions made no sense to me. And when I couldn't answer, or didn't want to answer, I got pestered, with the same question over and over and over. This has taken a lot of my time, and has been exhausting and upsetting.