THE CASTLE AT FRANKIE'S
Lyrics by Arthur Levesque -- bs@boog.org -- http://boog.org
(To the tune of "Copa Cabana" by Barry Manilow)
(The idea to parody "Copa Cabana" was Ken Weitzel's)

Her name was Janet
She was a virgin
A kiss was all she'd ever had
And it had only been from Brad
He asked for her hand
She thought he was grand
And then they drove off in his car
But they didn't make it far
The left front tire was blown
And the spare tire was gone
The clouds were heavy, dark, and pendulous
Where could they find a phone?

At the castle, castle at Frankie's...
The hottest spot for hanky-pankies
At the castle, castle at Frankie's...
Music and passion led to fishnet fashion at the castle...

They both made love
(Made love ... not with each other)

His name was Frankie
He wore a corset
He was sashaying to his chair
He saw Brad and Janet there
And when he finished
He had them disrobed
But Frankie was a bit extreme
Riff Raff pulled a gun and screamed
And then the lasers flew
With antimatter, too
He shot Columbia, Frank, and Rocky
Then Scott said, "Good for you!"

At the castle, castle at Frankie's...
They never lied Riff, he was cranky
At the castle, castle at Frankie's...
Bradley is bleeding and the beast is feeding at the castle...

They both got hitched
(After ... the castle at Frankie's)

Her name is Janet
She hated "Showgirls"
Both she and Brad are married now
But hey've lost their way somehow
Now it's shock treatment
But not for Janet
She's got a brand new dress to wear
Farley's building her career
Bert, Nations, and Cosmo
Have got a brand new show
Farley has got it all together
Which way will Janet go?

At the fact'ry, Farley's Faith Fact'ry
Brad and Janet victims of quack'ry
At the fact'ry, Farley's Faith Fact'ry
The sun never sets on those ride in it from the fact'ry

Denton Denton
(Do it ... we're gonna do it)
Denton Denton
(Do it ... we're gonna do it)