I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MODERN TRANSYLVANIAN
Lyrics by Arthur Levesque -- bs@boog.org -- http://boog.org
(To the tune of "...Modern Major General" by Gilbert & Sullivan)

FRANK-N-FURTER:
  I am the very model of a modern Transylvanian
  I've had intercourse mechanical, unusual, and alien
  I know the Kama Sutra, of its study I'm obsessional
  From Miss'nary to Doggy-Style, with nuns in a confessional
  I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters homosexual
  I understand all sodomy -- oral, anal -- I'm professional
  In my laboratory I'm creating brand new decadence
  With much experimenting with the spark of life and accidents

MAGENTA/COLUMBIA:
  With much experimenting with the spark of life and accidents
  With much experimenting with the spark of life and accidents
  With much experimenting with the spark of life and accidents

FRANK-N-FURTER:
  I'm a designer engineering, biochemical, interiors
  I know the scientific names of organs, veins, posteriors
  In all relations mechanical, unusual, and alien
  I am the very model of a modern Transylvanian!

MAGENTA/COLUMBIA:
  In all relations mechanical, unusual, and alien
  He is the very model of a modern Transylvanian!