Every woman has endured one kind of heartbreak or another. We've all had the unfortunate experience of betrayal, and we've grieved over the difficulty of getting past it. As Christian women, how do we process the hurts we go through? And where is our God in the midst of them?

In the book of 2 Samuel, King David's daughter Tamar suffered an unspeakable violation at the hands of her brother Amnon, who afterward, rejected her and cast her away. The Scripture says: "Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the ornamented robe she was wearing. She put her hand on her head and went away, weeping aloud as she went" (2 Sam. 13:19, NIV).

Often people with problems are made to feel sub-Christian. We view them as an inconvenience because they require more time than we want to give.

Talking with them about anything other than the weather might get us entangled in their struggles, so we pass a few pleasantries and quickly find our seats. We rush out after the sermon, more concerned with the football game on television than the person next to us in the pew whose life is shattered.

How can we say, "I love God" when our interaction with the needy is governed by such self-serving, don't-disrupt-my-routine snobbery?

Have we deceived ourselves about the love of God? "Dear friends," pleads John, "since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another" (1 John 4:11, NIV).

So, how does one actually love another? Ask yourself: "Am I the sort of Christian with whom someone would feel comfortable sharing? Or am I intimidating?

"Does my demeanor say, 'Yes, I want to help; Yes, I care?' Or do I communicate, 'Stay away; you're a disgrace?'"

Then ask God to make you a minister of His compassion and acceptance. Allow Him to use your life to heal the brokenhearted.

Just as a great sculptor gives complete attention to detail, God shapes every aspect of our character. With precision, He moves in rhythm with us through every turn of events in our lives, molding us into useful vessels.

God will place men and women in our lives who have walked this way ahead of us. They understand the refining process and will be able to encourage us so that we get the most out of the lessons.

For all of us, life gains rather than loses meaning as we relinquish our supposed power as independent women. In dying to ourselves in the midst of adversity, the very power that raised Christ from the dead moves into our lives!

It is very valuable to be aware of where we are in the stages of personal and spiritual growth. If we are in a particularly difficult stage, it is encouraging to know that it will not last forever.

On the other hand, if we are in a rich place of deep service to others, seeing where God has taken us and where we are going increases our gratitude and prepares us for the next adventure.

As Christ's character grows within us, others will begin asking us to lead them! Our gifting and yieldedness to the Holy Spirit will qualify us. With His life and power within, effective ministry is finally possible.

In the book of Joel, God said that women would prophesy. Paul the Apostle also stated that women would prophesy. Some say women should not minister to a mixed group. However, we find that Priscilla helped her husband to instruct Apollos more fully in the way of the Lord (see Acts 18:26).

Phoebe, an unmarried woman in the church, attended and took part in a business meeting at Paul's commission (see Rom. 16:1-2). The great letter to the Romans was delivered by her. And women had a prominent part in the ministry of Christ Himself. All four Gospels bear out the fact that after His resurrection Christ appeared first to women. Jesus ordained women to tell the men that He was risen.

Thank You, Lord, for using women throughout history to proclaim the glorious gospel. Use me as You see fit. In Jesus' name. Amen.

Whether it's things, people or our dreams, loss comes to us in many ways. Life is never quite the way we imagine it to be.

But loss is not going from having to not having; it's going from one thing to a new thing.

Paul understood that he had to lose everything to gain Christ (see Phil. 3:7-8). He could no longer trust in people, things or his own ideals but had to put his trust in God. His willingness to lose himself transformed him from Saul to Paul.

Jesus transformed death (loss) into new life. This is the model He gave us--embrace loss. Don't try to avoid or deny it.

Ever since the fall we have been trying to get back to the Garden of Eden. We long for that perfect place of rest, peace and intimate connection with God and each other.

Thankfully, Jesus came to show us how to find that connection. He tells us we must lose our lives to find them (see Matt. 16:25).

This is radical thinking. The challenge is not to fear loss but to embrace it so you can find the new thing. That way you will not be dependent on people, things or your ideals to meet the needs of your soul.

We must be dependent on God and nothing else. Our every hope lies in Him.

If God has shaken an area in your life, don't try to rebuild it yourself. Allow Him to restore only those things He wants to establish in your life. Remember, God shakes us so that the things that cannot be shaken will remain.

His shaking will expose any hidden idols in our lives. An idol is what we give our strength to or draw our strength from.

If you are receiving your affirmation, love, self-worth, joy, strength and acceptance from anywhere or anyone but God, He will shake it. He does this so you will get your life from Him. He knows everything else will eventually disappoint you.

After a shaking we see our condition in relation to God's truth. However, it is not the truth you know but the truth you live that sets you free. To become responsible we must be obedient.

We would not grant as much liberty to a disobedient or rebellious child as we would grant to an obedient and responsible child. A disobedient child would use his liberty to rebel. He would confuse rebellion with freedom.

Rebellion will bring bondage. Only through obedience can we find true liberty.

As the Holy Spirit ministers truth to your heart, receive it and walk in freedom. Let God's truth become alive in you.